Monday, June 29, 2015

What is a Funk and How Can I Avoid It?

 
Lightstock.com
Photo credit: Lightstock.com
 
Do you sometimes feel like you are just not yourself and you don't even know what is the matter? My husband and I call this, being in a funk.  According to Dictionary.com, a funk is described as
"cowering fear; state of great fright or terror," or "a dejected mood." Sometimes, these funks can last only a few mere hours, or just for a day.  Other torrential times, they can last for weeks, months or even years.  What causes these funks and how can we recognize them so that we can avoid them?
 
cowering fear; state of great fright or terror
 
Funks are not bad days.  Everyone is entitled to a bad day.  Funks are getting ourselves so deeply and darkly depressed that we ourselves don't even notice at first.  We start to blame other people for our moods.  We then to start to pick at every single aspect of our life that we are not satisfied with.  We feel justified for our attitude.  This can be extremely dangerous and not only for ourselves, but for the very people we care about.
 
a dejected mood
 
Several years ago, before I was married or had children, I was in an emotionally abusive relationship with a man.  I started to lose weight because I didn't feel I was thin enough.  I worked with this person, and I wanted to be the best and prettiest person in the office we all worked in.  Sounds ridiculous now, but as a young twenties something, it was very real in my mind.
 
I began to lose so much weight, that my clothes literally were falling off of me.  I had to go buy all new clothes because everything I owned did not fit anymore.  To make matters worse, this person would belittle me so much that food just didn't even taste good anymore.  Life wasn't feeling good anymore. 

And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Hebrews 10:24
 
It got to the point to where I was out to eat with my Dad, and he voiced concern for me.  I had gone from a healthy size 12 to a size 4 in a year's time.  For my body size, I looked anorexic.  I was in a funk, and someone had to snap me out of it.
 
My brother, my Dad, and my best friend (who later becomes my husband!) collaborated and the three of them saved my life.  I moved out of state and in with my best friend.  He and his family then helped me become me again.  It would take some time, but I was eventually returned to my normal, healthy self.  I married my best friend and we were very soon pregnant with our oldest child.  I rededicated my life to Christ and was baptized after my son was born.  I was so grateful all these people who cared about me, came together to restore me and ultimately was saved by the grace of God.  Not only did these people who love me not give up on, but God did not give up on me.
 
You may ask, why I am going into all of this?  I've had someone very close to me be in a funk lately.  To respect their privacy, I am not going into details but this person received a rude awakening to the funk they were dealing with.  This person had the best of intentions in pursuing a great goal, but unfortunately put everything on the back burner.
 
Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Ephesians 6:13
 
The truth is, a funk can happen to any of us.  When this happens to someone we love, it is not best to attack this person.  They need nurturing love and support, and to be told everything is going to be ok and that you have their back.  They DO NOT need to be told all the ways they messed up, or what they had at stake to lose.  Upon waking up from this funk, that person knows all too well what they could have lost.
 
What You Can Do to Avoid a Funk:
  1. Pray - God hears our prayers and knows our hearts, even when there are no words. 
  2. Be in the Word - I can't tell you how off my day can be if I am not in my Bible.  Even if it is 5 minutes in the morning with a cup of coffee, I need to be held accountable for my actions and beliefs.  God always sends the right message or piece of scripture I need to hear that day.
  3. Stay away from people who go out of their way to take away joy, peace, or happiness - This person may be a fun character and awesome to be around and just joke around with, but this person is a thief.  They are there to distract you from leading a good, God filled life.  Your actions and life unfortunately don't rub off on this person, and it is usually the other way around.  Old habits and behaviors creep back in and we may hurt people we love before we even know what happens.
  4. Be joyful - The news lately has been depressing to the point where I don't watch it anymore.  Do things that make you happy: write, read, run, blog, swim, dance, yoga, watch a movie with your kids and slow down, have a date night with your husband, etc.
  5. Look at the positives: God has given us all blessings.  Look at your children's faces. Look at your spouse. Look at your best friend. Look at your mother. Look at your father. Look at your siblings. Look at your nieces, nephews or grandchildren.  Go have a nice day with them!
  6. Don't get caught up in material possessions: We come in this world naked, and we are going to leave it with nothing as well.  Don't look to see what your neighbors or friends have that you don't. Be grateful for what you do have.
  7. Get outside and get some fresh air - Sometimes all you need is to get out and get some sunshine.  Go for a walk or to the park with your kids. Do you live near a pool or the beach? Sunshine does a world of good!
  8. Slow down, and dare I say...take some things off your plate for a season - I feel like technology is supposed to make our life easier, but it seems we are busier than ever. Busier to the point where we have to have every single second of our days and weeks planned out with sports, tutoring, dance, piano, going to the gym, school, work, family events, church events, friends events, etc. Take a breather and look at your schedule.  Could you do without one thing so maybe you had family time with your kids or a date night with your spouse?
His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. 2 Peter 1:3
 
If you are going through a tough time, I encourage you to reach out to someone, even if you have hurt them.  Chances are, that person loves you so much and they want to help restore you to your natural self.
 
Are there any other ideas that you can think of to avoid being in a funk? Have you, or someone close to you been in a funk? What helped you get through this time?
 
Blessings,
 
Kelly
 
#inspirational
 
 


26 comments:

  1. I think these times of feeling down are often caused by the enemy as well as hormones. If we can fill our minds with truth and get out and exercise and ask God to transform our minds, we'll be on a path toward feeling "normal" again.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi, Susan! They are absolutely caused by the enemy. I like how you said filling our minds with truth. The enemy doesn't want us to see truth, he just seeks to destroy. I am so thankful we have a Savior who loves us, and who wants us to seek truth and love. Thanks for your comment and have a wonderful week :)

      Delete
  2. These are such great tips for getting out of funk! I've struggled with post partum depression twice. I wish someone had given me a hand to get out of the depressions. Today, I work very hard to stay positive and follow the rest of your tips. I think it's so important to be proactive with self care.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi, Barb! It is a hard thing to be in a funk. Not only are you hurting, but the people who care about you are hurting because they see someone they love hurting. It is very important to stay positive and just remain in God's Word to keep that darkness at bay. Praying for you and thank you so much for commenting!

      Delete
  3. Great post! I love your 8 points; we all need these :) Thanks for sharing at Together on Tuesdays!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi, Lisa and thanks for stopping by from Together on Tuesdays! I appreciate your comment and hope you have a fantastic rest of your week :)

      Delete
  4. I'm grateful for how you've turned the hardship of the funk you were in way back when into lessons that can help each of us take positive steps out of a funk. I went through something similar to what you've described, Kelly, when I was in my twenties as well. It was for different reasons but the way I tried to handle my problem was very similar to what you've described. I'm so glad you had people who cared enough about you to wake you up to what you were doing to yourself. Also glad to hear that you married your best friend and later rededicated your life to the Lord. You've shared an inspiring account for us and I truly appreciate your vulnerability and insight, my new friend!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi, Beth! I enjoy being able to encourage others and let them know it's going to be ok. This was a very hard situation I went through and I am thankful for the blessing that came from it. I so very much appreciate your comment and hope you have a wonderful week :)

      Delete
  5. Amen to that, You are correct in the definition because I went through a funk just a week ago which thank God lasted a few hours. My husband went through one and his whole day was off beat. I love this post.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi, Minnie! Glad to hear it was only for a few hours or for a day, but those funks can feel like they will last forever. Not fun to go through at all. I'm glad you enjoyed the post and am thankful you left a comment. Hope you have a fantastic week :)

      Delete
  6. What a great and very practical post!

    I love all of the suggestions that you've shared for staying out of a funk.

    The ones that especially are good for me to hear are:

    ~ Stay away from people who go out of their way to take away joy, peace, or happiness.

    ~ Don't get caught up in material possessions.

    I really needed this post today.
    Thanks for sharing~
    Melanie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi, Melanie! I am so glad that you enjoyed the post and that it was helpful to you. These are daily reminders to myself as well because getting into a funk is something that can happen to any of us. Thank you for commenting and I hope you have a fantastic week :)

      Delete
  7. We all get this at times.. I loved the way you took us right back to God! Stopping from Reflect. http://janncobb.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi, Jann! Whenever these hard times occur, we need to go right to God with it. It is sometimes that very thing we don't do because we think we can handle it but it does need to go to God in prayer. Thanks for commenting and I am headed over to your page now :)

      Delete
  8. Now I know what to call it. I've always wondered what to call this feeling appropriately. Now that that has been identified, these tips are really helpful I say. :)

    I hate having this funk. Sometimes they just come! Good to always avoid them.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey, Lux I am glad that these tips were helpful. It is not an easy thing to be in a funk, so I agree, it is best to avoid them completely! Blessings to you and thanks for commenting :)

      Delete
  9. Great post for us Mamas! My go-to places are prayer and my iPod audio Bible, especially if I can't get away to be along and read! Thank you for more thought-provoking ideas :)
    Loved reading here on your blog today! Blessings!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi, Jacqueline and thanks for stopping by the blog! That is a great idea to listen to the audio of the Bible! Both of my boys are auditory learners so they can hear something once, and they have it memorized. I'm glad you stopped by today and had some of these ideas be helpful for you. Thanks for commenting and have an amazing weekend :)

      Delete
  10. My Daughter just Texted last night and said she was feeling sad so she started "making a list of all the amazing things I've gotten to do with my life and I'm at two full pages so far. I've been in at least 20 different states and 4 countries. and I wanna say thank you cause I couldn't have had these experiences without you." waking up to her text brought me more joy than she will ever know. Being grateful works, writing out things works. doing so and dwelling on it daily - works. We all get into a funk, yes - even me.do what you know you need to do. it works.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That is so awesome, Marie! It is wonderful for grown children to turn around and thank their parents! What a beautiful thing that is and it shows what a great parent you are! Thanks for sharing your story, and ideas on what helps to get out of a funk. Blessings to you my friend :)

      Delete
  11. Thanks for this great post on an important topic along with the suggestions to help us get out of that funk! Being there for others and having others there for us is a true blessing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, hopetoinspireyou! That is one of the best blessings is knowing someone will be there for you and vice versa. Thanks for commenting and hope you have an amazing weekend :)

      Delete
  12. I just quit my PT job because of a "funk." I was overwhelmed to the point of severe anxiety, dealing with health issues - it was time to scale back. It took my husband, daughter, and sister to help me realize it was okay to do it! You've got some great advice and insight on this post!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi, Jennifer! I am so glad to hear that your family stepped in and helped you realize this. It is not worth the stress and the lack of joy to be in a funk. Praying for you and hope you are taking the time to relax and recover. Thanks so much for taking the time to comment :)

      Delete
  13. thank you for all the notes and the tips..have a wonderful weekend.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, Indah Nuria Savitri! Hope you have a wonderful weekend as well and thanks for commenting :)

      Delete